Writing Pt. 2

The man dropped to his knees, under the weight of the sun's scorching beam.  It was low in the sky, but that didn't seem to help with anything.  The man looked into the distance, and saw on the horizon the tiny speck that was his goal.  He allowed himself to fall forward onto his hands.  He ignored the burning of the sand on his palms.  Sweat streamed from his face into sand, where it evaporated in seconds.  Like his will, it was leaving his body, without any way that he knew of getting it back.

He completely detested suicide.  It was a cheap way of removing yourself from your problems.  However, when did giving up and allowing yourself die change from suicide to death by dehydration?  Was he committing suicide by allowing his body to collapse now?  Did it matter what the root cause of it was, if the fact remained that he'd be long dead before anyone found him?

With labored effort, he pushed himself back onto his knees, and opened his arms to the sun.  Wishing that the sun was feeding him energy instead of sapping it away, he allowed himself to stay like this for a couple minutes.  Eventually, he made his decision.  He determined that he had passed the line, and he was fine with it.  He allowed himself to fall onto his back, slowly closed his eyes, and let exhaustion overtake him.

Awakening

So, I lucid dreamt last night.  Side note, auto-correct is telling me that dreamt is no longer a word xD.  Here's my story though.

I vaguely remember the things before it.  My buddy MattDave told me an important lesson, but I either forgot what it was or I didn't grasp the meaning of it.  That happens often.  He has such great wisdom but I find myself getting lost.

I was in a school.  Probably symbolizing the metaphysics school that my friend Levi was telling about.  And within (Where I was doing the learning, it was where I met MattDave as well), I eventually met someone I went to school with who asked me if my siblings and I wanted to go over to her place for the 4th of July.  I told her no.  These things are actually unimportant and I'll skip them.  Eventually, one of my old friends from Altoona asked me a question about my lucidity.  I responded that I was completely lucid, but to question myself.

I walked into the night, out of the school, mulling over this.  Confused.  It was then that I questioned why there was a Target next to the school.  Both the school and Target disappeared, and it instantly transitioned into day.

I was left to talk with Kayla.  I meditated on ways to make life better, and discovered that I am unpleased with where I'm at now in life.  I am staying at my job, which I'm capable of doing but not enjoying, out of a sense of loyalty. We lost a teammate, and so the team is pretty much spread thin as it is.  I am realizing I am coming to enjoy it.  I'm not sure if I'm just not comfortable with working in general.

That's a place holder for a different discussion.  The other key point was that I tried very hard to fly.  I wanted Kevin time to mull over those things.  That's where, struggling with flying, I found Superman.  Though he didn't say anything, I realized that the key to flying is not the velocity, it is simply the will.  I will fill that in later.  It's time to actually wake up in real life and begin my run.

Note to self

To everyone else, I'm sorry, but this will sound weird.  But I'm in an era of change, and this is the only way it will happen.

KEVIN: LISTEN TO YOURSELF.

Step 1: Experience
Step 2: Notation
Step 3: Meditate
Step 4: Review
Step 5: Decide
Step 6: Update

Random Quote

Remember:


The reason most major goals are not achieved is that we spend our time doing second things first.

- Robert J. Mckain, writer

Physical Update

So, working on updates: I went to the gym yesterday (Totally all on my own accord, because I wanted to run, w00t!).  Moved up to 17.5 minutes of jogging consecutively, with a hard run at the end for the last minute.  Ahead of where I want to be.



My current training strategy for running: I'm going to try to move up a couple minutes more per every 2 runs, up to my goal of 30 minutes consecutively.  When I get there, I'm going to begin to up my pace.  Every day I run, I'm going to try to go 0.1-0.2 miles per hour faster.  I'll do this until I get to 6.7mph.  After that, I'm going to slowly increase the incline until its at about 6 degrees.


When I get here, I should be able to do a 5k in 30 minutes.  A bit more if it has obstacles.  This won't be my stopping point though.  This is my just first set of goals.  I'll redefine them as I go along.

Lesson of the night

Live, feel, believe

Slowing down even more

So, just some proof that slowing down really helps.  In a couple of my lumosity games, I'm scoring about as high as I normally do when I go fast, as when I slow down and make 0 or 1 mistakes.  However, I believe that it's allowing my mind to learn to do these processes faster, instead of finding short cuts and accepting more errors.  I'll keep an eye on this for a couple weeks and see where things go.  However, in the past week, I've recovered almost all of the BPI points I've lost over the past two months, where speed/scoring the highest was the main concern for me.

Random Quote #2

Long-range planning does not deal with future decisions, but with the future of present decisions.

- Peter F. Drucker, management consultant